:)

you were always hard to hold
so letting go ain’t easy
i’m hanging on but growing cold
while my mind is leaving

why does every song lyric remind me of you?

i love you more than songs can say
but i can’t keep running after yesterday

i just wish you fucking cared.

why don’t you miss me? ever? i still can’t figure it out. after all you’ve told me, i can’t understand how you don’t. i still miss you like crazy, although not as bad as last time. i don’t want to bring this up though, cause i feel like you’ll think i “need you.” maybe i do. is that a crime? is it really that different from a year or two ago? if i changed your life so much, why do you not need me or want me now? am i really that indispensable?

i want to ask you all of these questions, but i more than likely will never do it.

i just want my best friend back that i could talk to about anything and who understood me completely.

i just want someone to talk to.

i really wish you hadn’t said that to me. i feel extremely awkward even talking to you now. for someone your age, you’re pretty stupid. i can’t believe you’d even think it would be ok to say that. after i told you how i felt about it already. jesus christ, why did you have to ruin things? right when i was starting to open up.

greenwich mean time -five (GMT-5)

jenna2step:

(“to various persons, all at once” / part three.)

I never want to say “I don’t understand” because a) my pride gets in the way, and b) I think I might, just maybe not in the same way as you. Sort of like how the words “I love you” mean different things to different people, and at different times.

-Different times, like how our sleep patterns overlap, how my future is your past.
-Different times, like three hours ahead, East-coast time, and the sun always rising over your head when the moon is watching over me, and I am tucking myself in.
-Different times, like how “I’ll talk to you later today”s never make sense to me, because it never feels like tomorrow unless I’ve gone to sleep and then woken up.

You said you’d try to crawl into my dreams and stand guard so that I could get some rest instead of only ever waking up in a cold sweat. My own personal sort of hatavat halom, I guess, and “I love you”s on the horizon lines of my lips.

You helped me grow
Now you gotta let me go
Cause I have learned to fly on my own

every time i hear these lyrics, i think of you.